Better But Not All Well

After speaking to the matriarch,

It felt better to know that she is not against it.

That's one big relief.

But now that it is neither here nor there puts me in a spot.

It is really not that easy to 'just chuck it aside for now'.

When it comes, I guess you really can't shield or avoid it.

If I could control my feelings, then I wouldn't be this miserable.

I wonder if the feelings are mutual.